Sarah Wise

What was your relationship to exercise before you started strength training at Fitology Hub?

Exercise has always been a bit of a dirty word in our house. I'd be horrified if I had to run for the bus!  I called it the ‘R.U.N. word’ - I'd have to spell it out because I didn't even want to say it, let alone do it! I walk everywhere because I don't have a car and I’ve always done physically active jobs and enjoyed the occasional hike, but I'd never set foot in a gym before coming here.

I did yoga for a while. I used to go with my daughter and we got quite into it, but then, after about nine months, we stopped because the class moved further away and it became too difficult to get to. I swapped to Pilates and loved it, but then covid struck. I do clinical work in a hospital, so while everyone else was doing online exercise classes, I was working hard in intensive care. It was exhausting. Then, in December 2020, I was diagnosed with cancer and underwent major surgery.

That was the beginning of five years of serious illness and injury and dealing with the fallout of some complex family issues. I still feel seismically changed from it all. I'm lucky that I'm quite optimistic, which usually helps to keep me afloat in tough times, but I had got to the point of feeling pretty defeated by life. My health had been such an issue that I had started to feel like being ill was my new normal. I wonder now if I was suffering with depression and grief from everything that had happened.

How has strength training impacted your life?

After about three months of training once a week, I was walking home with my usual heavy load of shopping, but I was carrying it so easily, I thought I must be missing something – I actually stopped to check the bags in case some of it had fallen out! It was an amazing moment when I really noticed the benefits in my daily life. When something like that happens, you start to pay attention.

I work and I'm a single parent to an adult child with a serious chronic illness and, before I started training, all my spoons would get used up very quickly. I've had a lot of therapy, post-cancer, but since I've got stronger, I feel like I've recovered from something I didn't know I was suffering from. I used to be constantly exhausted, dragging myself around. I was so exhausted after work; in my head I'd be raging that younger people wouldn't give up their seats for me on my commute home, but now I feel like I did ten years ago! The contrast is astounding.

Before I started lifting weights, I hadn't realised how low I was feeling. I was in a constant state of stress, always worrying about my daughter or if my cancer had returned. Now my checks are annual instead of every six months, so I have more respite from the looming stress and worry in between scans. I'm not in the gutter anymore - I may only be sitting on the curb, but I am definitely on the way up!

I came to Fitology Hub exhausted, but hopeful. Strength training has given me a lot more stamina and, with more in the tank, I've got the energy to take on a few more shifts at work. That extra money means we get to worry a bit less about making ends meet and I can even afford to do nice things again sometimes, like fork out for a train ticket to visit my friend who lives by the Sussex coast. I might not be able to go as often as I'd like, but I can fill up my bowl now when I really need to. I couldn't before and I felt stuck.

I can now deadlift more than double the weight I could when I started and I'm always showing people my "guns"! I feel really proud of myself!

How has being a member of Fitology Hub impacted your life?

When I came in for a consultation, I really had to psych myself up – I was so anxious. I had decided to start investing in my health. I wasn't feeling strong at all but I knew that lifting weights could benefit me in so many ways. I was so ready to join, but I couldn't afford it and I was absolutely gutted. Suzanne saw how much I needed something to lift me out of where I was and offered me a partially sponsored membership for six months. She said a lot can happen in six months and she was right!

It's such a supportive environment and I've never felt like I'm being judged. Because I work shifts for the NHS I can't stick to the same time each week, so I haven't joined a regular session, but because everyone's so kind and welcoming here, I feel like I'm the lucky one. I don't have just one team; I belong to loads! I think of my sessions as a little sprinkle of magic.

In my first ever session, I couldn't do back squats, so Rachel G gave me "goblin" squats (I know they're called goblet squats really, but I like my way better!) and I didn't think I could even do that, but I did it! I hadn't realised how much strength I'd lost so it was a bit of a shocker to discover that, but the way adjustments are made for me in sessions always makes me feel like I'm achieving. I never feel like I'm inadequate or that I'm failing. It’s always a boost.

I wasn't used to being the newbie who doesn't know what she's doing. Being in that position made me feel a bit wobbly for the first few weeks, but it was also freeing in a way. One day, I said to my coach, half as a joke, that I might just lay on the mat and cry today, and she said, "That's OK, you do whatever you need to do." I took my time, but joined in the session and ended up lifting a new personal best! I had arrived to the session feeling so low, but left buzzing! That was a huge moment for me.

Fitology Hub and the community here has felt like a lifeline and I am so grateful for Suzanne's act of kindness. I know she wishes she could offer more people the opportunity to be sponsored, but, for now, Fitology Hub are able to support two women per year and I feel so lucky to have been one of them. My six months is over now, but they still support me as much as they can and I'm so happy to pass this baton on to the next woman. I feel genuinely changed by the experience and I just know she will too.